If you only have…
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If you only have… |
You can still… |
Why it works (Research insights) |
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30 seconds |
✔ Offer a calm, attuned greeting ✔ Make eye contact (if culturally appropriate) ✔ Use the person’s name |
Regulation begins with relationship, even micro-connections build safety (Perry, 2021) |
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2 minutes |
✔ Reflect back emotion (“That sounds really frustrating”) ✔ Validate: “You’re not alone in feeling that” |
Validation builds trust and reduces shame (Herman, 2015; NHS TI Practice Guide, 2023) |
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5 minutes |
✔ Ask: “What would help right now?” ✔ Offer choice (where to sit, take a break, reschedule, etc.) |
Offering choice helps restore agency, critical in trauma recovery (Bloom, 2021) |
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No private space |
✔ Lower your voice to signal safety ✔ Sit side-by-side (not face-on) ✔ Use a neutral, kind tone |
Body language and tone matter more than words (Van der Kolk, 2014; Perry, 2021) |
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No time for follow-up |
✔ Signpost clearly: “I can’t stay, but I’ll pass this on” ✔ Write a short, warm handover |
Feeling “seen” prevents disconnection, even when support is passed on (NHS England, 2023) |